Bit of Ivory

Shortly after we moved into the house we’re in now–nearly 20 years ago–I was playing with my brother’s action figures. He had some cool ones– a Skeletor whose chest showed damage when you punched it, an Orco that spun around when you pulled out the little plastic cord, and a Yoda figurine, among others. I was playing with at least the Yoda and the Orco, which of course needed a flat surface. Since I was in the basement, which is mostly carpeted, I found myself sitting in our hallway just outside the furnace room (more of a hallway, really, except that it doesn’t go anywhere), making use of its concrete floor. I started Orco on his merry spinning way, and spin he did– right into Ben’s Yoda figurine. Yoda went spinning, too– right behind the furnace. I brought out the flashlight and the yardstick and searched, but to no avail. Yoda was lost. Ben was mad.

Fast forward until today.

At 8:30 this morning, Welch’s Heating and Air Conditioning showed up to begin the process of replacing our old furnace, which has been dying slowly, and installing a new central air conditioning system to replace our swamp cooler. “Maybe they’ll find Yoda,” I joked. I went off to work, not thinking much about it.

About an hour later, my mom called. Yoda, lost for 20 years, had been recovered. He was very dusty, but otherwise unharmed. He even still had his little utility belt.

The Force looks after its own, apparently.

And I am forgiven.

Got my letter from the English Composition department. I will not be teaching English 115 in the fall.

GAH.

They said that they just had too many qualified applicants. Yeah. Still makes me feel like I suck. And now I will have graduated with my masters degree with no teaching experience whatsoever, which is not going to look good on either Ph.D. applications or junior college teaching positions. I also will have no job in the fall, since this internship is set to end at the end of June, and even if it doesn’t, I can’t see me working as hard as I have been while writing my thesis.

Of course, there are “other opportunities for grad students.” Yeah, like Research Assistantships that only let you work for 10 hours a week. That will NOT pay rent. Or “every once in a great while they hire grad students in the writing center.” Yeah. Great. The only thing that seems remotely possible to me is a chance to TA in one of the literature survey courses: Early British Lit, Later British Lit, and American Lit. I have no idea how much they pay, but it’s got to be better than a Research Assistant. I checked out the schedule for Fall, and. . .

Dr. Steven Walker is teaching a section of Later British Lit.

You may remember that Dr. Walker was my undergraduate mentor, and is my thesis committee chair. I’ve sent him an e-mail.

If he’s already got a TA, I’ll move on to Dr. Fox, who co-taught (with Dr. Walker) the Tolkien and film class I took last fall. And then on to Zina Petersen, who was my Modern American Usage teacher in my undergrad, or David Paxman, who I worked with on a research project for my Intro to Grad Studies class last fall. And then I’m out of options, and will have to either stay at home next semester, get a student loan, or both.

*headdesk*

This is so not good.

The Snape and Sirius threads at SQ are driving me BATTY. It’s not that either of them are particulary bad today– no worse than usual, at least– but they’re both extremely popular at the moment. The Snape thread is the fastest moving thread at SQ, did you know that? Seems almost counter-intuitive, considering that SQ is supposed to be a bastian of Ron-love.

One more paper to finish. Must send it off tonight. And then I am DONE. DONE DONE DONE.

Until Wednesday, that is.

My worst fears about my graduate studies have been realized, seemingly. I was scared that my tiredness and lack of energy would have an effect on my ability to perform up to my full potential. When I took this internship, I was afraid that all my creative energy would be sapped in my work, leaving me with little to use in my studies.

For the first time in forever, I have writer’s block on a paper.

It’s not a problem of not having a good idea: the idea is great (fealty in LotR). It’s not a problem of not having enough material: if anything, I have too much.

I just can’t figure out how to say it.

And I don’t know how to fix it.

Missed school and work yesterday, and work today. I don’t know exactly what it is, a kind of coldy- flu-y thing. It started with a sore throat and a humongous headache and progressed to a stuffy nose, waves of nausea and a fever. So am hanging out at my parents’ house. It SUX, really, since I actually have things I need to accomplish at work and we’re finally talking about The Lord of the Rings in my Arthurian Tolkien class. Not to mention my term paper that’s due coming up waaay too soon. Not a good time to get sick. Luckily Ginevra can go where I go, even if it’s flat on my back in our family room, and my homework involves reading The Two Towers..

In other news, I registered (kinda) for Fall semester. I can only actually register for one of my planned classes in the fall. The other one requires being accepted as a graduate instructore to register, so I’ll add that one after I get the job (see how optimistic I am?). And I can’t decide if I want to break up my thesis hours over two semesters or cram them all into one; at the moment I’m thinking I’ll break them up, but we’ll see. Those can’t be registered for until I turn in a prospectus, which I’m planning on submitting sometime after July 16 ;). Anyway, I’m sure I’ll enjoy my British Mystery Writers class come fall.

I love grad school.

Letters. ‘Cause I feel like it today.

Dear Mr. Scott,

Thank you so much for insisting on giving us sight reading exercises in choir every day in high school. Not only did it make for incredibly funny moments when you accidentally picked a hymn from the protestant hymnal that happened to be the same tune (right down to the parts!) as our oh-so-familiar Mormon hymns, but it must have actually stuck, as it enabled me to sing with my home ward choir on Easter Sunday even though I only knew one of the songs. Definitely a skill worth having.

Fond Remembrances,

Emily

Dear Jen,

Although I requested Peanut M&Ms, Almond M&Ms would also be acceptable. Lisa prefers Plain, however.

And we all like Mint Choc.

Mix CD is coming. Will be able to worx on it over Conference Weekend.

Still jumping up and down for you,

Em

Dear Hale Centre Theatre,

I’ve come to expect such great things from you. Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat? Amazing. Jane Eyre? Engaging. The Scarlet Pimpernel? Spectacular. So why did your The Slipper and the Rose leave me relatively cold? It’s a great movie. Has some fun songs. Puts a twist on the Cinderella story. It could have been so good on stage. But you had to go and ruin it. Oh, it wasn’t the costumes. They were wonderful. It wasn’t the staging. It was fun. It wasn’t the special effects. Those were impressive.

It was the pacing.

Everything was too darn *fast*. The music was too fast. Have you ever heard of ritardando? You know, slowing down the tempo at certain points in the song to milk the emotion? Apparently not, judging by the tempo of the musical numbers, especially the love songs. Having your principals gasping for breath while they sing of their love is not a good idea. And I know that the movie is long and that some things have to be cut, but really– cut out the relatively unimportant (although highly amusing) musical numbers like What a Comforting Thing to Know rather than rushing through the most crucial scenes, namely the ball and the wedding. You just went and sucked all the emotion out of it by trying to cram too much comic relief or fluff or just plain nonsense into it.

Do better with Ragtime and 42nd Street, K?

Hoping,

Emily

Dear BYU IT Department,

Why oh WHY didn’t you tell me sooner that I could download a simple client to allow me to print to the network printers on campus from my own laptop? I’ve wasted SO MUCH TIME and money transferring files to disks, jump drives, e-mailing them to myself, etc., only to stand in line waiting to get access to a computer just so I could print. GAH.

Frustratedly,

Emily

Dear Car Gods,

I know that I Asked For It by swapping locking-keys-in-the-car stories with my coworkers on Tuesday, and that me locking my keys in the car while filling the gas tank at Costco mere minutes afterwards is incredibly funny, but did you have to extend your misguided sense of humor to having the battery run down at school today, therefore requiring my sisters to drive over from UVSC after class to give me a jump? I swear, if I get a flat tire or have someone hit me in the next few days, there’ll be no ritual sacrificing of motor oil from me.

No love,

Emily

Dear nice boy in the English Composition Office,

Thank you for letting me turn in my application to teach Freshman English next year, even though you thought it technically was too late. The only excuse I had was absentmindedness, so I am eternally grateful.

Thankfully,

A prospective graduate instructor

Dear Ze’ev and Leslie,

Welcome to the Dark Side.

Evilly,

Wahlee

Dear my hair,

Do you like your new cut? I do. Except I’d like it more if you’d cooperate. Why must you insist on flipping under on the left side and up on the right side when you’re less than shoulder length, no matter what I do or what product I employ? I want you to look good, dang it, so I can take a picture and show all my internet friends!

And don’t be fooled by my real-life acquaintances commenting that they like you. I am not satisfied. Shape up.

Irritatedly,

Me

And that pretty much updates my life.

That’s what this week has felt like. Just keep swimming, it’ll all be over eventually. What I really need is a nice vacation, but it ain’t happening. BYU, for some reason I will never fully fathom, does not have spring break. The only holidays we get in winter semester are for Martin Luther King day and President’s Day. True, we get out for the summer earlier than all the other schools in Utah, but in most cases I’d rather have the mid-semester break. Oh, well.

In any case, between school and work and root canals, I became overwhelmed last week. I was assigned another 1000-page novel in my Victorian lit class (The Pillars of the House by Charlotte Yonge), 4 chapters of The Road to Middle Earth for my Arthurian Tolkien class, and had a paper due in said Tolkien class on Friday. I’d done my best to budget my time to accomplish all of these, but There ended up being simply too little time in the week. With almost no dilly-dallying other than a couple of odd half-hours, I still managed not to finish the novel though I stayed up till 2:30 the night before it was due in the attempt, and had to get an extension on my paper. I hate getting extensions; I hadn’t had to ask for one since I was in high school and got bronchitis over spring break when I’d planned on writing a research paper. There was no other choice, however; it was Friday, that paper hadn’t even been started, and my teeth hurt.

They still do, actually. I think if the root canal had been anywhere but on my front tooth that serves as one end of a bridge, it would have felt better by now. As it is, it gets bothered too much. I’ve been popping ibuprofen along with my antibiotic. If it doesn’t improve by Wednesday I’m going to call again. It’s quite annoying. The root canal was supposed to make it stop hurting, not the other way around.

Friday night we had a family Looney Tunes party at my uncle’s. It’s always more fun to watch cartoons with a large group of people who have the same twisted sense of humor. We saw lots of good ones– “Rabbit Seasoning” (would you like to shoot me now, or wait till you get home?), and “The Rabbit of Seville” (Don’t look so perplexed, why must you be vexed, can’t you see you’re next?) and “One Froggy Evening” (Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my ragtime gal) and “A Bear for Punishment” (G-U-N P-O-W-D-E-R. Duh. . . tobacco! I am a good speller, I am! C-A-T: dog. B-A-T: Rhode Island) and many more. Much fun was had by all. My stomach hurt the next day from laughing too hard. We watched cartoons for a good 3 hours and didn’t get to half the good cartoons. It’s obvious we must have another installment.

Another great thing to happen this weekend: I have the new Real Group CD!!

*dances*

I know I’ve raved about The Real Group before, but really, folks, you’ll never hear anything like these 5 Swedish singers. Their newest album, The Middle of Life is one of their best yet. I’m completely in love with several tracks. Like Words. And Spring is Coming. And Are You Coming to Me?. And The Grass is Greener. And The Perfect Life. And. . . oh, heck. The whole CD is amazing. And best of all, it’s all in English. Not that I don’t like their Swedish stuff, even though I can’t understand a word. I could listen to R??ster all day, especially as it was my very first introduction to The Real Group, even though I have no better idea of what they’re saying now than I did when I first heard Pippi Langstrump-Potpurri (other thn the fact that it’s about Pippi Longstocking) back when I was 16. Maybe I could get to teach me Swedish.

Anyway, if you ever feel like broadening your musical horizons, check out The Real Group. You can order all their CD’s (except the Asian imports)through Primarily A Capella here in the states, or some of their stuff is available on Amazon.

*walks away singing “words, a letter and a letter on a string”*

Just had a root canal. Not my favorite experience ever. Although, in terms of pain and suffering, this doesn’t come close to some of my dental procedures. The worst was during the process of getting my new bridge and caps done. They gave me some novacaine that was supposed to last a shorter time, because I was supposed to go back to school and they didn’t want me numbed up all day. Well, the novacaine lasted for only a short time, all right– a total of, oh, 15 minutes. All feeling came back after they’d taken my old caps off and left my front 5 teeth exposed. That hurt like hell (and since I try not to swear, that’s saying a lot). I was crying, it hurt so bad. They ended up giving me another shot of the regular novacaine, and everything went fine after that (although I ended up being numbed for *hours*), but boy– that was bad. The root canal, with its few moments of intense cold and pain and the dull ache I’m now left with is relatively harmless.

So. Fiddled with the template all day. I think it’s finally working the way I want it to. I went in and adapted the default template and style sheet. I had to add a third column, change the colors, add the banner to the top (which I made all by myself in Photoshop using a letter of Jane Austen’s), create template modules so that I could include my sidebars in the archive templates, re-add in all my links to websites and other blogs (I haven’t added my writings back in yet, but I might soon), and various other things. I still haven’t figured out how to set a default font for the sidebars (CSS is still somewhat of a mystery to me), so I had to use a workaround for now. I’m quite pleased with the way it turned out, though. I even made sure that the container for the blog itself was about 800 pixels wide, so that anyone who still has an 800×600 monitor (poor souls) can view it without having to scroll. I didn’t make the design fluid rather than fixed, though. Maybe another day. This was complicated enough.

Especially considering how few people read it these days.

Long-term plans for Bit of Ivory include making it more of a homepage than a simple blog– a photo gallery, a writing portfolio, etc. It would give it much more of a reason for existence. But that will have to wait.

Am a bit miffed that my trackback entries to The Leaky Cauldron keep getting refused for “questionable content.” Hmph. Like *I* would post questionable content. Melissa, anyway you can add me to a whitelist or something?

You will notice that I now require a name and e-mail address for commenters, and that if you have a Typekey identity, you can log in with it now. Non-Typekey comments will be moderated. Part of the upgrade to MT 3.15 is these comment features, and I mean to take advantage of them. I haven’t gotten any spam since the server move, but I doubt that will last forever, so I must do what I can to protect myself. I hate coming online and finding 300 e-mails linking me to Viagra sites or whatever. I know it’s a pain for you commenters, but I figure that people who didn’t comment when it was *easy* won’t miss the convenience.

In other news, I went to the dentist today. No cavities (thank goodness), but I have to have a root canal next week. It probably could have been put off for longer, but my dental insurance runs out when I turn 25 in June, so I need to get it done sooner rather than later. Not looking forward to it particularly, but on the other hand, I’ve had so many dental procedures that I’m not particularly dreading it either. After having your gums cut, 5 teeth ground down to little stumps, and two sets of bridges/crowns, a little root canal is cake. My teeth hurt at the moment, though. I hate it when they use that ultrasonic thing.

We’ve been having gorgeous weather around here lately. It was 64 degrees today, the hottest day of the year so far, and I drove with my windows down most of the day (not on the freeway, though. That would be stupid). I love spring: the warm weather, the flowers, the blossoming trees, the allergies. . . oh. Wait. I don’t like the allergies. It’s not fair that they’ve already hit me. And the Zyrtec that worked great in the fall is doing absolutely NOTHING for me this year. *sigh* I’m willing to put up with allergies, though, for the pleasure of spring.

Scholastic and Bloomsbury revealed the covers for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince today! I love the American cover. So much, in fact, that I made a wallpaper of it!

(click on the thumbnail for the full image)

This one’s for those with 600×800.

1024×768

I didn’t make a bigger one, but I can if someone wants it.

129 days!!